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The Forbidden Codex of The Pink Beyond - A Sqrl's Journal

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October 18th, 2016

05:25 pm - Sqrlstation Move
Y'all haven't heard much from me here for a bit, and you're about to hear even less for a while as we box up the twin PCs that make up my command station. Both Pinkstation NEO and ChatVector RED have to be transported off to the new place, and I'll be down to just the unnamed celphone for things like twitter and telegram and the like.

If all goes well I should be back up and streaming and posting about beating games nobody else has heard of within a week's time at the very worst, probably sooner.

Please look forward to it.

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October 10th, 2016

03:21 pm - Life with Woof and Sqrl - Plan C
WOOF and SQRL are, somehow, STILL MOVING HOUSE. They discuss this in the car, in a way that is PARAPHRASED HERE because SQRL has the MEMORY of a CHEESE DOODLE:

Woof: "...so I guess... plan A is gonna be to try to use the wheeled handcart to move all those books still in my room and maybe the bookcases, and then... take the beds apart?"
Sqrl: "Mm."
Woof: "...and I guess plan B will be to find help if the bookcases and beds weigh too much. We might have to call movers."
Sqrl: "Many strong men await you."
Woof: "...uh, okay. But otherwise we're gonna have to haul all this stuff ourselves."
Sqrl: "Okay, but about the floor layout we're going for--"


Sqrl: "...I may have to go home, load up The Sims 3, and show you what I mean."
Woof: "So plan C is for me to burn down the apartment while you pass out in a puddle of your own urine."
*long, thoughtful silence*
Woof: "That was a joke."
Sqrl: "No, no, I think you've got something there."
Woof: "That was a JOKE."
Sqrl: "A -brilliant plan- of a joke. I like your line of thought. Let's keep that on the table."
Woof: "...we still have to move the table though."
Sqrl: "goddamn it."

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October 6th, 2016

10:10 am - Oops.
Medical, depression, profane.Collapse )

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September 26th, 2016

11:58 am - Recordkeeping: Skylanders - Spyro's Adventure (PS3) COMPLETE
My first replay! Kind of. I bought the three Skylanders games I already own for the PS3, because my Wii U copies of Giants and Swap Force have some issues (used eBay purchases aren't pristine, who knew) and I'd rather have them all on one system (they were spread across Wii U and 360 before).

I love these little toys still, even if I haven't yet bought into Trap Team (which does its damndest to invalidate your collection) and Superchargers (which is a racing game primarily I understand). Still, if I can pick up someone else's used collections of those games or something, I may.

I sadly had to break my streak of Perfect Dragoning Spyro-related games, because... well. It's difficult to say what counts as perfect running a Skylanders game.

Let's take the first one as an example:
Get the achievements/trophies? (Doable with just the starter-pack Skylanders). Three-star every level? (Need 7.) Collect every figure? (32, with cosmetic variants, some of which are quite rare, goodbye wallet.) Do every Heroic Challenge (32 of them) with every figure (also 32 of them)? And of course the toyline expands with every game, with more and more goals and more figures to collect and...

No, I'm not a Perfect Portal Master. I am a happy one, though.

Oh. Also we'll be moving throughout the month of October. I may be sparser.

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September 21st, 2016

08:56 am - Recordkeeping: Crime Secrets - Crimson Lily COMPLETE
Another hidden object game, this one published by Artifex Mundi. They always seem to put out the hidden object games closest to a traditional point-and-click adventure: Lots of puzzles, very plot-heavy, etc. Indeed, this particular hidden object game was completed without doing any hidden object scenes at ALL. Instead, you can play a nice round of shangai solitaire/mahjong-tile matching and bypass the hidden object stuff entirely.

Which goes to show that genres are awfully flexible things, doesn't it?

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September 19th, 2016

01:21 pm - Recordkeeping: LiEat COMPLETE
A trilogy of short (45 minutes to an hour each) RPGs about a wandering con-man and his adopted daughter, a dragoness who feeds on lies.

I'm sorry, Steam, can you sell me a ladder? I need help reaching the HIGH CONCEPT shelf where this one's stored... okay there we go. I say they're RPGs but even that's somewhat inaccurate. There's "combat", but it's pretty easy, particularly if you rustle around. Every one of the games has some equipment upgrades that are super-ridiculously-overpowered (get a guide) so you can just handwave the combat away as a narrative concern and focus on the story.

The story is pretty good. A little confusing at first, but they're like miniature mysteries: Get dropped in, figure out what's going on, solve the "case", the end.

These are of course Japanese. If the Japanese narrative style grates on you, don't buy these. But I thought this was worth my time and I was correct.
Minor spoiler here...Collapse )

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September 15th, 2016

03:38 am - The Crew follow-up.
Even more obscene than last time. I"m sorry.Collapse )

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September 14th, 2016

11:22 am - Recordkeeping: Ongoing - The Crew
So, "The Crew" was free on the Ubisoft store and I was like "eh why not, free is free". It's some sort of always-online car racing thing and they appear to have attached a plot to it. I sent some IMs to a friend about the plot, and their reaction made me decide to preserve them here. So:

BEGIN IM BARRAGE. Warning - Obscene.Collapse )

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September 10th, 2016

06:01 pm - Recordkeeping x4 Combo: Living Legends - The Frozen Fear Collection, Pink Hour, Pink Heaven COMPLETE
Two each of very similar games.

Pink Hour, Pink Heaven: Cute free miniature advertisement-games for a game called Kero Blaster. I gather in that one you play as a frog who shoots things. In the Pink games, you play as a pick secretarial blob that shoots things instead. Which was fun. These were not terribly complex and only lasted a little while. There was an unlockable hard mode which utterly destroyed me within a minute of start but might be tuned just perfect for someone better than I am.

Living Legends: The Frozen Fear Collection - Two hidden-object games revolving around the damage a crazed ice witch can do to a community. Hidden object games are all functionally very similar, but they're where a good hunk of the DNA of modern point-and-click adventures has branched off to and I have a strange fondness for them that I really don't feel a need to justify. I feel too painfully burned out and exhausted to play much of anything "serious", so quite likely this is what I'll be doing for a while. Happily we have a hell of a lot of these, and I'm almost surely going to eat through the stack like popcorn.

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September 8th, 2016

03:11 am - Recordkeeping: Super Pitfall COMPLETE
When I was younger, Super Pitfall was one of my favorite games. A huge sprawling labyrinth of secrets, I found something new and interesting every time I played, whether it was a completely different world with zombies in trenchcoats, a way to unlock a strange door, a diamond, or a weird sunny place.

I never beat it, though. I didn't know about the continue code, and it did have issues, like all the items being invisible unless you jumped in just the right place. Still, it was a real favorite.

The Internet's louder voices in gaming considers this game somewhere around the level of "I might wipe my ass with this if it was the only object in my house not on fire."

Every game has a fandom. In this game, it was Brazilians and others with the "Phantom" NES-clone. They played the game, they enjoyed the game, and a couple of them made new graphics for the game, did new music tracks, touched up the jump physics and added an autosave.

Super Pitfall 30th Anniversary Edition let me FINALLY beat this game. Maybe I didn't beat it the pure way, but I don't know if I really care after all these years. Besides, this way was more fun.

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